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Electro Sex: A Beginner’s Guide

Electro sex (also known as erotic electrostimulation or e-stim) is the practise of getting yourself or your partner off using electrical stimulation. Some e-stim devices can cause prickly, tickly or painful sensations as well, making them suitable for use as a kinky BDSM torture toy.

Some of the fun things you might be able to do with electro sex toys include:

  • Apply current to your genitals and have a hands-free orgasm
  • Apply current to your skin and enjoy a tingly, relaxing electro massage
  • Punish your partner with a short, sharp electric shock to the buttock
  • Turn yourself into an electrode so you can shock/stimulate your partner with just a touch
  • Make exciting-looking sparks between a device and your skin

All of which are fun activities. BUT, electro sex is expensive to get into, and is often perceived as risky or complex; something that puts many people off ever even trying it.

If you’re not yet sold on the power of e-stim, here’s a quick guide to get you started with electro sex.

Contents


Why do people enjoy electro sex?

Different kinds of electrical play

What does it feel like?

Safety considerations

Recommended electro play starter kit

Fun electro play ideas

Why do people enjoy electro sex?


There are lots of reasons why people enjoy playing with e-stim devices. Here are a few:

You might be able to get off from it

An electro sex kink guide - illustrations showing why do people enjoy electro sex?

Some people (both male and female) can make themselves come using an e-stim device, without any other physical stimulation. By running current through their genitals, they experience a feeling that’s often described as “fucking/being fucked by a ghost”, which can lead to intense hands-free orgasms.

It can be relaxing

An electro sex kink guide - illustrations showing why do people enjoy electro sex?

Plenty of people enjoy playing with electro sex toys not because they find them sexually stimulating, but because they find them relaxing. Indeed, lots of e-stim toys are derived from massagers or pain-relief devices that originally had a purely therapeutic purpose.

It’s nerdy fun and looks cool

An electro sex kink guide - illustrations showing why do people enjoy electro sex?

Playing with electricity is dangerous and exciting. It requires a little bit of learning, some careful attention, and messing around with expensive, complicated equipment. This speaks to the nerdy side of a lot of kinky people. Basically: sparks looks cool.

It’s a new and unique kind of pain

An electro sex kink guide - illustrations showing why do people enjoy electro sex?

Adding e-stim kit to your kinky arsenal gives you a totally new way of inflicting or receiving pain. Electricity can be used to tease and torture a willing partner, or to enhance the sensation and pain from other types of play such as impact play or needle play.

Enticing medical vibes

An electro sex kink guide - illustrations showing why do people enjoy electro sex?

Many e-stim devices have a sleek medical look to them… and there’s plenty of fun to be had wiring someone up for some electric shock therapy or inserting a probe to electrically stimulate them. If you’re into medical play, electro sex is eminently worth exploring.

Different kinds of electrical play


E-stim toys can be divided, approximately, into three categories.

TENS and EMS

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

TENS (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation) machines and EMS (Electric Muscle Stimulator) machines pass current through the body, at varying depths (EMS machines go much deeper). This stimulates nerves and muscles, creating “under the skin” sensations, and potentially even causing muscle contractions.

Violet wands/massagers

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

Violet wands, neon wands and other similar devices use high voltage electricity to provide continuous stimulation to the surface of the skin. These generally create sensations that are lighter, tending towards being prickly or tickly, and which don’t penetrate beyond the surface of the skin. They also create sparks, hurrah.

Cattle prods/shock sticks

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

Cattle prods, shock sticks and other punishment-centric devices use bursts of high voltage electricity to provide brief and painful stimulation at the surface of the skin. They basically just hurt – a bit like a very intense static electricity shock. There might be sparks, but they’ll be briefer and less spectacular than the sparks you get from a violet wand.

What does it feel like?


TENS and EMS machines produce a sensation in or under the skin that feels a little like vibration. Some people enjoy this sensation, and liken it to “fucking/being fucked by a ghost” when it is applied to their genitals. At higher intensities this sensation can become painful, develop to a jabbing, prickling or piercing sensation, and cause muscular contractions.

Violet wands produce a sensation that people often describe as tingling, tickling or prickling. It’s a bit like getting thousands of tiny, mild static shocks one after the other. Some people enjoy this sensation and some people find it unpleasant.

Cattle prods and similar shock devices produce a painful sensation that’s quite similar to receiving a very intense static shock: a short, sharp snap of pain that might feel a bit like being jabbed with something sharp.

Safety considerations


Electricity is, of course, potentially dangerous. And not fully understood by most people. The combination of these two things means that a lot of people are understandably nervous about exploring electro play.

Fortunately there are some simple guidelines you can follow to significantly reduce the risk involved in playing with e-stim devices.

Contra-indicators to electro play

As a general rule you should avoid electro play altogether if you:

  • Are pregnant
  • Are epileptic or have a similar condition
  • Have a pacemaker
  • Have any kind of heart condition

There is some evidence that using a TENS machine can have negative effects on people who fit into these categories.

That might be disappointing if you’re really keen to try electro play. If that’s the case, I’d recommend that you instead investigate powerful vibrators and non-vibrating toys – these create some interesting and comparable sensations.

Avoiding the heart

You should avoid doing anything that might cause current to pass through the heart, as this can interfere with the heartbeat. This is mainly a concern with TENS and EMS devices, although some people prefer to play it safe and avoid the chest altogether with any electrosex device.

To avoid the heart, never place pads or electrodes near the heart, or in such a way that the shortest path between them is through the heart. For example, placing one electrode on the front of the chest and one on the back is a bad idea, as this would cause current to flow through the chest, dangerously close to the heart.

For simplicity, many people take this further and simply decide to confine their electro play activities to below the waist, far away from the heart.

You should also be careful to completely switch off the device you’re using before touching or removing pads or electrodes. If you leave the device on you risk accidentally creating a pathway for electrical current that passes through you or your partner’s heart.

As a general precaution, turn off all devices before making adjustments, and avoid touching electrified body parts while the current is still flowing.

Avoiding the head

Many people also prefer to avoid the head. While it isn’t automatically dangerous to put a violet wand near your head, this remains a generally sensible precaution. Your head is where you keep your brain, your eyes, your ears, and a bunch of other sensitive little organs. For some people, it’s also the site of a lot of piercings, fillings and other bits of metal.

For simplicity, it’s best to just avoid the head.

A safe electro-play environment

The environment you play in should be set up to facilitate safe electro play. Take a quick inventory of your space before you begin playing and look out for:

Trailing cables. There are often a lot of wires and cables involved in electro play. These can pose a trip hazard, and also sweep things off shelves and knock stuff over. Keep your cables tidy and make sure there’s some slack in any wires.

Anything flammable. Electro play sometimes results in sparks. For this reason, you should avoid having anything flammable in your play area. Of course, you don’t normally play surrounded by petrol cans and bottles of lighter fluid… but you may also want to remove fluffy blankets and other ignitable items. The ideal surface for electro play is something non-conductive – a wooden bench seat, for example.

Conductive stuff. Of course, you’ll also want to avoid conductive stuff. That’s metal, basically. Metal tables, lamp stands, bedframes… while you might not be able to remove these altogether, you should be mindful of them as you’re playing.

Wet stuff. And finally, there’s wet stuff. You and your partner and your playspace should be reasonably clean and dry before beginning an electro-play session. If anything gets wet, squirty or sweaty during the session, it’s a good idea to take a moment to clean up and towel off before continuing.

A safe electro-play body

Before engaging in electro play you should ensure that you are in generally good health. The person receiving electricity should be fit, well and hydrated. Being ill or dehydrated can change the conductive properties of your body, making electro play more unpredictable.

The difference this makes is relatively small, but it’s still worth considering. And besides, it’s just generally good to be fit, well, hydrated and happy before engaging in any BDSM activities.

Avoiding burns

Tens and EMS

To avoid causing burns when using a TENS or EMS machine, ensure that the pads adhere well to the skin. Burns happen when a pad partially peels off the skin, reducing the contact area through which electricity is flowing into/out of the body.

To ensure good adhesion, use fresh pads for each session, and apply them to clean, dry skin. If you’re hairy, you may wish to shave the area for better adhesion. Some people find that shaving irritates their skin, and so have to shave the day before their play session to give their skin a chance to recover. If you’re sweaty or dirty, you can also clean and dry the area to improve adhesion.

Throughout the session, check that pads are still firmly in place. They may loosen or slip if the wearer gets really sweaty.

Violet wands/massagers

Violet wands can cause minor “sunburn” thanks to the UV radiation from the sparks they produce. To avoid this, keep the wand moving and don’t apply it for longer than a minute or two to one part of the body.

Cattle prods/shock sticks

These are quite likely to cause minor skin irritation or even small burns. If that’s not something you want, experiment with a different toy instead.

Recommended electro play starter kit


Here are some kit recommendations if you want to get into electro play.

Tens machine

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

One of the cheapest and easiest ways to experiment with electro play is to pick up an ordinary, medical TENS machine (here’s a decent one available on Amazon). These are relatively cheap, and safe enough that they’re sold in high street pharmacies. They’re very simple to use, and produce some seriously interesting sensations.

You’ll also need to pick up some compatible TENS unit pads, of course. You can re-use pads a few times with the same partner, but you shouldn’t use the same pads on multiple partners, and should dispose of them before the gel loses its stick.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

If even a TENS machine is intimidating you a bit with all its buttons and wires, you can get started with a very simple, disposable butterfly pads (again, available from Amazon). These offer far fewer options, but are incredibly simple to place and use – and so make a great starting point if you’re really not sure about this whole electrosex thing, and just want to see what it feels like.

Electro Sex Unit

If you enjoy the sensations provided by a TENS machine, you may want to move on to a dedicated electro sex unit or “box”.

I’d recommend Electrastim and E-Stim Systems. Both are established companies that make reliable products with a range of accessories.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

If you want something really simple to use (and relatively inexpensive) opt for the ElectraStim KIX Beginners Electro Sex Stimulator Pack (available from Lovehoney US, Lovehoney UK and Bondara). This is extremely simple and easy to use, comes with everything you need to get started, and will open up some more electro play possibilities over a TENS machine.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

If you’re ready for a more serious unit (for example, if you want to experiment with insertable electrodes and greater control) try the E-Stim Systems ElectroPebble XPF Electro Sex Kit (available from Uberkinky). Again, being a kit, it comes with everything you need to start playing, plus some other fun things like electro cock loops, etc.

Violent Wand

A violet wand is a bit more of an investment… and there’s always a chance that you won’t enjoy the sensation. I recommend trying one before you commit to owning one. Violet wands are often brought out at play parties or some munches, and if you ask nicely you can usually sample the sensation they provide.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

If you decide that a violet wand is for you, the UberKinky Violet Wand (available direct from UberKinky) is a good one to start with. It’s not insanely expensive, but is easy to use and comes with a variety of attachments.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

For a slightly higher price point, you can also try the KinkLab Neonwand Violet Wand (also available from UberKinky). It has a little more power and few more options in terms of attachments and settings.

If you’re all in and want a more powerful bit of kit, you could look at antique violent wands (try eBay as a starting point). These are much more powerful than most modern violet wands… but are also a little bit less safe – you should only play with an antique violet wand when you are 100% confident you know what you’re doing.

Cattle Prods

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

If you’re looking for a cattle prod device, a good starting point is the Master Series Electro Shank Electro Shock Blade with Handle (available from UberKinky). It vaguely resembles a knife, but is completely blunt. Instead of cutting, it delivers a short sharp electric shock to its victim. And all you need to supply is a willing victim and two AA batteries.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

A lot of people love the idea of a shock collar… but don’t love how close the electrical contacts on a shock collar are to the head. A good alternative for male submissives is the Master Series Cock Shock Remote Controlled Cock Ring (available from UberKinky). This comes with a velcro shock unit that fits most cocks, and remote control that can trigger a shock from 25 metres away.

A Basic Guide to Electro Play - An introduction to electrosex and electro sex toys, and recommended electro play kit by Lascivity

And, of course, there’s also the absolute classic electro shock toy, the Tazapper (which you can buy from Amazon). These are chunky, cheap, plastic, toy-like, and not terribly powerful… but despite this they might look familiar to you. Tazappers often appear in BDSM porn, and are a popular toy for no other reason than their familiar, iconic look.

Fun electro play ideas


There are a limitless number of fun things you can do with electro play kit. Here are a few fun ideas to get you started.

Body contact with a violet wand

If you hook up a violet wand with a body contact cable (available from The Violet Wand Store), you can turn yourself into an electrode. Instead of sparks being generated between the wand and your partner, sparks will be generated between your fingers and your partners skin.

This is a super cool effect, and a lot of fun. It looks and feels rather dangerous, but if done carefully and correctly it is a minimally risky activity. Ensure that your body contact cable is safety gapped, and that the “giver” keeps their contact firmly attached to a clean, dry patch of skin at all times.

Interrogation roleplay

Electro play devices lend themselves particularly well to an interrogation roleplay scenario. You can wire up your lover with a TENS or EMS machine and gradually increase the power until they crack and spill their secrets… or menace them with a cattle prod device while they’re tied to a chair.

The Tazapper is particularly effective when it comes to interrogation. For many people the sight of it is deliriously intimidating… as is the feeling of waiting to be zapped.

Medical scenario with a TENS machine

TENS and EMS devices are intended as medical devices… and violet wands originally had a medicinal application. For this reason, electro play kit lends itself well to medical play scenarios.

You can roleplay that the application of electricity via a TENS machine is a medical test or treatment. The medical vibes can be amped up by the use of gloves, masks, medical restraints and so on. More ideas for medical play can be found here.

Milking with a TENS machine

Attach the pads of a TENS machine to the cock of your beloved and you may, with some fine adjustment, be able to milk an orgasm out of them without ever actually touching them.

To add an extra layer of fun, an orgasm can be ruined by kicking up the power one level just as the moment of climax, resulting in a painful rather than a pleasurable orgasm – the perfect way to keep your horny partner drained but wanting more.

Fun with probes and other attachments

There are a wide range of attachments available for your electro sex kit – including loops for looping around a cock, probes for inserting into a cunt or arse, and clamps for clamping anything that takes your fancy.

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